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Widows support group celebrates 25 years in Maple Ridge

The group was formed in 1993 as a support for women widowed or divorced
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Members of the Begin Again Support Group for Women from left, Irene Jegeris, Lil Seigo, Sheila Priestley, Donna Bell and Rose Low. (Colleen Flanagan/THE NEWS)

A Maple Ridge group helping widowed or divorced women re-establish themselves after the departure of a partner is celebrating 25 years in the community.

The Begin Again Support Group For Women, formed by Lil Seigo and Joyce Perrine in February, 1993, is a grief support and lifestyle adjustment program for those 55- years and older.

Seigo worked as the senior outreach coordinator with Maple Ridge Pitt Meadows Community Services when she decided to form the support group. Her job was to visit seniors in the community and offer them services, but she found that she was coming across a lot of widows that were isolated.

She discovered that the only support group in the area had recently disintegrated and decided to start this one with Perrine, who had just arrived in Maple Ridge from South Africa where she was the leader of another widows support group.

The pair visited clubs in North Vancouver, White Rock and Coquitlam to see how they were operating before Perrine gave the group its name and took control.

Twelve widows joined the group that held their first dinner in June that same year.

“The idea was for people to get together and meet new friends in the same situation they were. Social support more than anything,” explained Seigo who was not a widow herself until 1999, the year Perrine passed away. That was the year that Seigo along with Rose Low and Irene Jegeris took over leadership of the group.

“You learn an awful lot about community,” said Low, who was one of the first widowers to join the group.

And, she says, when you talk to people you can understand what they are going through.

Jegeris joined the group in 1994, a year after her husband passed away. She discovered the group after reading about Perrine in a newspaper article.

“I left all my friends in Vancouver, so it was nice to make more friends,” she said.

Only recently have Seigo, Low and Jegeris passed on the leadership to younger members Donna Bell and Sheila Priestley.

“Rose and I had been trying to give the leadership up. When we turned 80 we decided it was time,” giggled Seigo.

Priestley has been a member of the group for 10 years, five years after her husband passed away, and says belonging to the group has made her blossom.

She says a lot of women find it difficult to handle the social situations, especially soon after they become widowed.

“Because you are still surrounded by friends and family. But that seems to fade away and now you are sitting all alone going, I can’t go anywhere I used to go because we’ld always to that as a couple. All our friends are couples,” said Priestley.

“The whole dynamic changes so women can very quickly become isolated and alone. And that’s what we want to do is break that,” she added.

The Begin Again Support Group meets from 2 p.m. to 4 p.m. on the last Friday of every month except in July, August and December.

Every session features either a motivational speaker on topics specific to senior women including representatives from ICBC, pharmacies, financial institutions, the RCMP and Maple Ridge Fire and Rescue. They have also had demonstrations by local community groups such as tai chi and Scottish dancers. Afterwards tea, coffee and goodies are served.

Currently there are 30 members in the group.

Men are not allowed although the women are willing to help set up a separate group if there is interest.

The group meets at the Ridge Meadows Seniors Activity Centre at 12150 224 St. in Maple Ridge, although they are independent of the centre.

On June 29 they will be holding a special 25th anniversary celebration.

Anyone is welcome to drop by but are asked to call Donna at 604-466-1173 or Sheila at 604-467-7183 to RSVP.

There is a yearly membership fee of $20.



Colleen Flanagan

About the Author: Colleen Flanagan

I got my start with Black Press Media in 2003 as a photojournalist.
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